Day 19. #30daybloggingchallenge

Discuss your first love.


Ah! This is a tough one. My love life has always been a mess – I laugh saying it although it isn’t a laughing matter.

I find the “first love” subject a particularly hard one to discuss because it’s subjective – as in, my first relationship wasn’t my first love (I know, crazy right?). Then again, I am only 19, I am still wondering if I really knew love or it was just an illusion or a childish wish. Looking back on this side of my life, I do differentiate between when I was in love and when I thought I was.

My first love… hm… I was fourteen at the time. It wasn’t the type of love I would give now – but I’ve changed a lot since then – and still, I feel like it was love. Not only for that particular moment in time; yes, we sometimes think we love someone, but it’s only the moment and as soon as it passes we wake up to reality and realise it was only a wish, an urge, a “what we need” then.

It was an innocent type of love.

Yes, I know it’s hard to believe if we look around at how some teenager act. But it was innocent in every sense – holding hands, going out, talking long walks, kissing. I’ve had my first real kiss with “my first love.” Haha. I remember being so nervous, and wondering how it would feel like, and if I can do something wrong.

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Present

We had history

But you didn’t care;

If only life had been fair.

I still miss you, at times,

I foolishly loved you

And now I must pay the price.

Although, the lesson has been harsh,

I do know now that-

For not falling apart-

To be present can be considered

Much more than important.

Love Is About Looking Into the Same Direction, Not Into Each Other’s Eyes

People’s actions have been driven by emotions since the beginning of the time and love is one of the strongest feelings one can ever experience – especially because it is present at so many levels in one’s life; from the love of the relatives to the tenderness shared with another being, with a person which completes you. However, nowadays, the concept of true love is regarded from a shallow point of view.

Sadly, some consider that love means suffocating the other with affectionate gestures and seek acceptance in their beloved. For these kinds of persons, love is about showing, about reassuring his dear of his perceptions. In the most cases, the problem is the lack of trust and self-confidence. Giving flowers, planning dinners, watching movies… they are all fine, but they don’t mean everything. That kind of love, where one’s always on his tiptoes and tries to impress using exaggerated gestures, it’s like a candle that burns way too fast. The beauty is in the long and steady journey!

True love is about sharing ideals, mutual understanding, trust and unconditional support. It is also about being honest – telling what’s wrong and trying to figure things out together. When two people love each other, they should look into the same direction because they want their future to be linked to one another. A relationship cannot progress unless the lovers stop looking into each other’s eyes in order to focus on building something together. Not only will it help the growth of the relation, but it will also strengthen it.

In time, looking just into each other’s eyes could do more damage because, at a certain moment, one will eventually see the defects his lover has – and they won’t be able to overcome them, as they have no idea how to communicate regarding real problems, the ones that matter to them.

Looking into each other’s eyes is fine just as long as the whole relation doesn’t revolve around this; because true love is about looking the same direction – grabbing the hand of your lover and stepping together on the same path in life.